Category Archives: Massage

Sickness and Massages oh My…

I am sick, and by sick I mean half dead. OK so maybe not BUT I sure feel like I could just fall over and die. Last week my supervisor type person was walking around the shop kind of sick, he assured me that it was just allergies but I was skeptical. He was stuffed up and coughing – OK so I could have almost believed it was allergies until he came forward and told me that he was cold, and achy and then I looked at him and said “you, stay out of this office until you are better, I do not want to get sick.” Of course he laughed at me, through the week I just kind of stayed away and hoped I did not get sick. Well Friday night roles around and I am out before 9:30pm, which is unheard of for me. Saturday I woke up, felt a little gross but nothing to major – a bit of a head ache and stuffy nose but that’s not abnormal for this time of year. And then Sunday, I woke up and I had a wicked cold, and by wicked I mean this thing could be the cousin to the plague, I am sure death is sitting outside my window waiting for me to just roll over and stop kicking.

My lungs are all congested, my sinus’ are so backed up that nothing is moving – seriously how much snot can one person make? I have spent almost 40 dollars on cough medicine, pills that help me breath but don`t make me drowsy, syrups that warms and makes me sleepy for night, camphor oil for my chest so I can breath, all of it mucous relief. So now I not only smell like a rank old lady but I also sound like a little old lady that has smoked for about half her life and could quite possibly have slept out in a soggy went box over night.

Put this nasty cold on top of incredibly sore shoulders, and migraine after migraine which I think is because of my sinus’ being backed up, and because mother nature is a menopausal bitch that cannot make up her mind if the weather should be cold or hot. I have not been in to the gym in over a week. So today, I decided I was going to make an appointment to get a massage. I have had several massages in the past – all of which have been quite enjoyable, so I make an appointment at a place that has come with high recommendations from a few people.

I get to my appointment, fill out the necessary paperwork and meet with Mark – my massage therapist. I am a little nervous as I have never had a male massage therapist but soon am comfortable and things get going. Let me tell you, this massage is NOTHING like I have ever had before. This guy is pushing, and pulling and moving limbs and it hurts. Not a lot but on a pain scale of 1 – 10, 1 being no pain, 10 being OMG STOP TOUCHING ME!!! I am sitting between a 5 and 7 and then… he has me lay on my back, raise my arm over my head and he proceeds to work my pectoral something or other muscle… and holy shit, I almost went through the damn roof, apparently this muscle was really really angry and really really tight. This continued for a full hour people – 60 friggen minutes of pure torture, by the end I was glad that it was over. Mark left the room and I got dressed, and while I was getting dressed I noticed something, my arms moved, freely no pain when I went to do my bra up, no pain when I put my shirt on, no pain when I rotated my shoulder, NO PAIN.

It has been 2.5 hours since my massage ended and by this time I am usually going, for fuck sake, I need to go back already because I am in pain!!! I am still pain free, my arms are still moving, are the places that were worked a little sore? Yes they are. Will I go back? Yes, yes I will, I am a bit of a masochist, but this was quite possibly the BEST massage I have had in my entire life.