Category Archives: True Story

And then I Rage Quit… On A Kitchen Table.

If  you have ever been a gamer, know a gamer, or are thinking about becoming a gamer you know what rage quitting is, or you have at least heard if what it is right?? No?  Well according to urban dictionary Rage Quit is defined as “When overwhelming rage caused by the online gaming world drives you into such madness, you quit from doing whatever the hell it is you’re doing.”

Cordee on a good day

I do not game – unless you consider playing Wii bowling, zumba, fit or the Sims gaming, than I guess I do.    But that is not the point of this post.  I have a brother, we shall call him Cordee ( I am so brilliant, this is actually his nickname that I use frequently).  Cordee games, he is a rage quitter.  His rage quits are often loud and sometimes he seems pretty violent (remotes have flown across the room, chairs have been broken) , and he will punch me if he ever reads this.    Again I digress this is not the portion of the post that has me rage quitting.

I normally don’t rage quit, I rage… but never rage quit.  That is until the other day when Cordee called me and asked me where he could put some crafts I had sitting on the kitchen table.  This is the conversation that happened after:

Me:  Uh… I don’t know.  Somewhere that they won’t get broken please, they are leaving this afternoon.

Cordee:  so… throw them against the wall gotcha.

Me:  No put them on the treadmill, they will be fine until I get home.  Why are you cleaning the kitchen table?

Cordee:  Poker night.  This table is disgusting when did it get used last?

Me:  I don’t know I fucking hate it so I never use it, unless I am crafting and then I use it.

Cordee: oh… I… See…

Me: Yeah its your other brothers table, I fucking can’t stand it.  When I get a place of my own there will not be a kitchen table, all the damn thing does is collect mass  amounts of other people’s shit, and get in the god damn way.

Cordee: whoa, calm down.  It is OK, no need to get angry.  And if there is no kitchen table where will people eat?

Me:  I am not angry, I am stating a fact, while using a lot of profanity.  It’s totally different.  T.V. Trays.

Cordee:  What?????????!

Me: T.V. Trays.  I will have tons of TV Trays and when people eat over they can eat off a fucking TV tray, and they can clean them off themselves.  I seriously hate kitchen tables.

Cordee: yeah well.. um.. I think every place should have a table.

Me: Yours can.  I refuse to have a kitchen table that will collect crap.  I must have counters, but I do not have to have a fucking table.

Cordee: so you will just be like “eat off a fucking TV Tray”?

Me: Damn right I will, and if people don’t like it well too bad for them they don’t have to eat at my damn house!

Cordee: You realize you are rage quitting on an inanimate object right?

Me: yeah so?  Shit.. my office phone is ringing, we will continue this conversation later.

Cordee: laughing – ok, talk to you later.


And there you have it people, I rage quit on an innocent kitchen table.  In my defense, the kitchen table in my house is a glass top table (worst fucking thing ever), and it shows every single finger print that is on it, had I been home I may have smashed the damn thing, and then made up a story as to why it was broken.  It also is home to everyone elses shit – none of it is mine.  Mine is all in my room, and that is a totally different discussion.